If you are a pessimist, you can imagine 25 different worst-case scenarios before you think of even one good one. For example, you get a dinner invite from one of your coworkers and instantly you imagine an awkward dinner. A trip to a great ski resort? At best you will be miserably cold; at worst you’ll break your femur and wind up under a 40-ton avalanche. Just pessimist thoughts.
Negativity may appear to be an excellent defense mechanism. If you keep your expectations low enough, you won’t be disappointed when life gives you the “ol’ one-two.” But research suggests otherwise. The trait to see everything in a negative light, coined “dispositional pessimism,” doesn’t only ruin a good time, it also can negatively affect your avenues for life (school, work, sports, relationships, et cetera).
The key to being happy? Well, before we answer that–we must first ask what it is that we are looking for.
What is “happy”? The Western world in which we live would like us to believe that it is a state of mind in which you are always feeling joy; a definition that, paradoxically, leads those who pursue it to only more unhappiness.
Instead of pursuing this unnatural state of pure bliss, focus on being engaged. When you are fully involved in something (like writing, reading, exercising, bird-watching, being with friends) it can distract you from endlessly obsessing over problems or concerns–a pessimist’s favorite pastime.
Engaging in your passions which distract you from ruminating–the pessimist’s favorite pastime mentioned in the paragraph above–leads to a sense of accomplishment, which over time, may change the way you start to see the world.
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